Each case we have encountered so far is different from one another. This is not just a case but a learning process for us. Here, Ms. Durga Das (name changed, 15 years) tried to elope because her parents had fixed her marriage.
The family, neighbors, friends, the village and the society – all play a very important role in one child’s holistic growth and development – physical to psychological. But that day, in Chhayari village of district Bankura, when a father was trying to marry off his daughter who has not reached the legal age of marriage, every piece in the child’s surrounding perhaps connived to make that happen. Luckily for us, our ground staff, the community social worker (Role CSW) received this information during her field visit and reported it back with the necessary details; like the contact number of her father.
Could it be just one person’s job to prevent or prohibit? In this case, as we later came to know, Durga eloped because her family did not leave any choice for her. Her sister Lakshmi (name changed), who is just a year elder, was married before turning 18. She had seen Lakshmi suffer and return to her parents, unhappy.
When we tried to speak to the father over the phone he denied the information and disconnected it. A few minutes later we received a call from the local political leader. He wanted to know the source of our information and started threatening us with dire consequences, if we pursued the case.
Then we approached the BDO and the police of Taldangra (Block), Bankura. The Police facilitated a visit to Durga’s house. Our team took a detailed note about the family and their living conditions. We started counseling – on the child’s development, the associated risks in early conjugal behavior, the possible legal actions that are related to such early marriage, and the like. They were also told that they would be held responsible, if Durga eloped to avoid this marriage. Our team also sent across a message to Durga and asked her to come back home – we assured her that her family has been apprised and they would not force her any more.
Sometime later, we could finally meet Durga physically at her father’s house and had a conversation in private regarding everything about her present situation. Why did she elope? With whom? Durga confessed that her elder sister was married off without her consent. Lakshmi’s in-laws, as she learnt from later, were not good to her. Durga did not want to experience the same fate. So, she eloped with the boy she knew as her friend.
Both the sisters had dropped out of school at an early age and their family planned the marriage to lessen the burden of feeding them. Their father had five daughters and did not have a stable income. They did not have a pucca house to live in. We tried to draw their attention on continuing education and pick up a skill which can help them to contribute to their family income. So, once the official procedures were complete, we connected them with the local High school and helped their re-admission.
This incident had far reaching effects in the villages around. Villagers requested us to run an awareness campaign for the other adolescent girls and boys. Today, Durga and Lakshmi are going to the school and the school administration is careful enough to let them enjoy their privacy with dignity.